Who are you allowing to speak into your life?

    Growing up, most of us were all groomed for three things:- 1. to get good grades, 2. to get good jobs and 3. to have good wives or husbands. Those were all that mattered. Here is the thing, our parents or the adults around us led us to believe that those are the most meaningful things in life. Those are the only things after God that we should all aim to achieve. Fast forward to this present day in my life. I struggled with number one. I am unsure with number two, and I am yet to see number three. Let's go back to the beginning.

    I was always the weird one, never interested in smoking or drinking, and crowds made me uncomfortable, so there was no partying either. However, I was the one who was more sensitive than others, would care more about others than myself and was the most obedient. I was also the one with the most insecurities and the lowest confidence. According to two teachers, I accidentally walked in on the day of the exam results. I was also the least likely to graduate. Keeping in mind, I was ten years old at that time. 

    Moving on to Junior high school, my insecurities grew larger. I was failing just as the teachers had said. I was least likely to graduate. Everything kept declining, and they were right. in senior high school, I failed every subject. I finished school at the age of fifteen (15) years old with nothing. I felt like a failure. I was a huge disappointment. The people I thought were my friends were now treating me like a disease. Here is where my story begins. I have learned, you have to be at your lowest to see where you need to be. Thankfully with the parents I have, they refused to allow my story to end at that point. My story, rewritten. I graduated, accomplishing number one.

    Eighteen years old now, eager to work and make my own money, I am hired to work on a farm. To me, this was the greatest thing ever. I could now start a path to do the things I wanted to do. I was now helping to pay bills. I was independent. Sadly, this was only temporary. 

    A year after, I interned at a Government institution. In the nine (9) months of my contract, I continued to improve myself. Approximately one (1) year after that internship, I started another project at another Government Institution. Here is where I remained. I pursued a Bachelor in Business Computing, completed some other courses while working. I got promoted and later pursued a Master's in Business Management. Through this period, I endured heartache, failures, exhaustion and disappointment. By the grace of God, I accomplished it and graduated. 

    Fast forward to 2021. I accomplished certificates in Introduction to Counselling, Advanced Counselling and a certificate in 'How To effectively lead change'. Who knows what I am to pursue later on. This story is not to boast but as a testimony to prove that God has a better plan even though others may condemn you. You may not have started out doing your best, but keep working, keep praying and keep practicing. 

Skinny Biatch

For years I have been hearing people going on diets to be skinny, for years I have seen numerous amounts of weight loss ads that claim they are the best and for years I have seen people depressed trying to become something they are not meant to be, that is skinny. My question is why is it such a big deal to be skinny? I have been skinny for my whole life, and trust me, it’s not all glitz and glam, we skinny people feel depressed as well, well some of us. I blame fashion magazines and society for this.

I have spent the latter half of my youth trying to put on weight because I was told I was too skinny, which is kind of impossible since neither my mother nor my father is fat, so any chance for me gaining weight would have to be through child birth, and I am sorry to say, a child is a no no at the moment. The more I tried to gain weight, the more it would become a failed attempt and the more depressed I became. Instead of gaining weight I would lose, so imagine an even skinner me, my measurements already 34 (bust), 25 (waist) and (37) hips and weighing 119 lb.

Now I am not saying this to boast, but just to show that skinny people has some insecurities as well, but such is life, its either we accept our flaws or let our imperfections destroy us. Ok so you are fat, if you don’t like it then try being healthy and not skinny; let’s face it, not everyone was meant to be thin, but if everyone stopped trying to fit in just because it’s the “it” thing, then this problem will be a thing of the past. Admit it, the people that pressure you the most about your weight are the people with the worst problems.

Come on people, it’s time you start living for yourself and stop letting others dictate the pace of your journey. Be comfortable in your own skin, yes it’s easier said and done, but it’s worth a try, what do you have to lose? Stop letting society be the mold for your existence. Start living you own life